I feel awful. I’m going to say goodbye tomorrow to friends that I need real liked. I’ve known them for five years now, and all that time I never truly appreciated their presence. I simply cannot stand how they prance about as if they are superior to every other being in the universe. They trample non-conformists with the words that come out of their mouths.

All these years I’ve been telling myself I don’t really need them as friends, but this trip has made me realize that I have no others. No friends. It is not fun. It’s physically painful. No one wants to associate with me, despite how hard I try to be accepted. I sit and watch my siblings goof off with their companions, while their older siblings ignore me.
I don’t know what I did wrong.